I fell into the blogging world entirely by happenstance. I was bored on a Tuesday, February night in 2010, and had long since grown weary of people’s mistaken assumption that you need to be perfect to do what I do. I wondered if my messy, absurd stories might encourage other messes like me to believe that God wants to use them, too. I wanted to shatter the Precious Moments stereotype associated with being a missionary in Africa-you’ll find no carrot bottom jeans here! [Dirty Carolina T-shirts, however, I have in spades.]
Not surprisingly, it was proving impossible to keep every single friend back home up-to-date with my third world adventures, and I wanted a way to take the foreign statistics that I grapple with every day in Dakar and turn them into names and faces and stories for people that have never stepped foot in Senegal. Writing makes me feel. It makes me remember. It makes me avoid doing laundry-and that just feels right.
Fifteen months later, there are approximately 200 of you that read this blog on a regular basis-and I only know who about sixty of you are.
Which begs one simple question: who are the rest of you, and how did you stumble upon my little corner of cyberspace?
To my endless entertainment, in addition to providing key bits of information such as how many people read my blog every day, wordpress also provides me with a list of search engine terms that have led people to Audacious Faith. [Never fear. I don’t like it either, and a name change is on the horizon after I leave Senegal.] Said list of search engine terms has provided me with hours of quiet amusement as I’ve snickered and wondered to myself how many missionaries have “butt naked redneck” lead to their blog. [Should I be embarrassed or proud? The jury’s still out on that one.] I’ve been meaning to share a list of the most entertaining, baffling, favorites with you for some time now.
Before we begin, you and I need to come to grips with the startling number of people that cannot spell the word “audacious”. I’ve seen every variation of it known to man-“audatious”, “audious”, “audashish”, “adauisus”…the mind-numbing list goes on. Fellow spelling enthusiasts that are as appalled with the American educational system as I am: I salute you.
As we both might have expected, scattered throughout the search engine term list are an infinite number of references to Christmas! Everything from the Grinch, White Christmas, “simply having a wonderful Christmas time”, references in some form to every single character on The Charlie Brown Christmas, Christmas trees, mistletoe, who hash, how to make who hash [and goodness, I wish I knew!], roast beast, snow, sleigh rides…
Bring it back, fellow Christmas elves. We’ve got to keep the celebration at bay until at least August.
References to Christmas, I expected. There was, however, no anticipating these little gems…
The Best of the Search Engine List.
1. Ballet Mom. [Go figure. I cannot tell you how many blog hits I’ve gotten from “Ballet Mom”. It’s embarrassing.]
2. Dashing through the sand.
3. Chocolate chip cookie dough pancakes. [This. Is. Brilliant. Don’t hide that creative spirit under a bushel, you budding gourmet!]
4. Coffee moments. [You can never have too many!]
5. Antique apple cider press. [Come again?]
6. It’s a ghetto fab life. [And indeed it is.]
7. Jesus Beanie Baby. [Coming this fall to a Kohls near you!]
8. Trollcat. [No. Idea.]
9. Best Water guns of 2010.
10. Her headshave in Wallmart. [For your edification, I’m going to preserve the original spelling on that one. Sadly, this would not be the strangest thing I’ve seen in a Walmart.]
11. Horrible birthday.
12. Dental hygienist flosses painfully.
13. Humiliated by dental hygienist. [Ah, friend. This is a safe place.]
14. Goats marriage.
15. Toaster oven cake.
16. Ghetto streetmeat.
17. Redneck girl underwear.
18. Hot plate recipes Africa. [I saw this, and felt instantaneously connected to you, whomever you are.]
19. “Like Mother Like Daughter” tattoo.
20. Jesus loves you a latte tiles. […This is mortifying to me. Whomever you are, if you’re still reading, I implore you to cease and desist your Christian knick knack search immediately.]
21. Senegalese coffee. [Palatable only if you first sear your taste buds off your tongue with an iron.]
22. Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles.
23. I keep blowing the fuse on my Christmas Tree. [I apologize, I was probably no help with that one.]
24. White butt tube. [I don’t ask questions, I’m simply here to report the facts.]
25. My naked butt.
26. White naked butt.
27. Almost butt naked. […there is no excuse.]
28. Miserable job.
29. Fattest baby alive.
30. Magic 8 ball decides my life.
31. Full body scabies.
32. Cow chicken dentist.
33. The best part of waking up is coffee that’s been pooped by a cat. [I kid you not.]
I don’t know about you, but I’m starting to wonder what on earth this blog is about. ;)
It might sound nonsensical, but there has been something immensely comforting in knowing that you were reading my stories. On the lonely days in Africa, that simple fact has made me feel…well, not. Feel free to remain anonymous-indeed, I stalk a myriad of blogs that I’ve never once commented on. However, if you have a minute, I’d really love to know who you are! If you woke up on the wild side this morning, you can leave a comment or drop me a line at ashley.elizabeth.peterson[@]gmail.com.
Whomever you are and however you got here-thank you for reading. :)